sorry guys!

Sorry for being silent for several weeks.. Just discharged from the hospital..my doc said "you have to finish these meds, have more rest and drink a lot of plain water...bla..bla..bla". Yesterday, i've finished all my meds but still i don't feel better but worse..hmm.. My mum drove me to the clinic nearby today to get my meds. My weight drop extremely...i'm so sad.. Just to get a glass of water from the kitchen is a trouble for me to walk...ugghh~ My world can be so dark anytime..

Back to my last week...i even can't sleep..almost think about suicide! (Maybe this is how Micheal Jackson's feeling). I don't know what are the things that can make me sleep and rest...lastly, i took a painkiller (just to try if it works). Yes! it did! I can sleep 'til 10am... Waking up that morning, still i didn't feel better..

Thank God for this sickness as i know that You want me to better take care of myself. By the way, i try to be strong in facing this... whether it can be cure or not, i put it on Your hands God. Thanks coz You teach me a lot..i know You love me and i miss Your hug and that kiss on my forehead.. I hope tonight i can meet you once more.. =D